Don't get kidney stones

[Transient]

About 7 years ago I had a brief ordeal with kidney stones which involved a short visit to the ER and a prescription for pain meds. I apparently passed the stone(s) while at the hospital, but I didn't even know it. Either the stones weren't that big, or the meds were that good. Whatever it was, I never learned what kind of kidney stones they were. The only thing my doctor could say was that I should expect to have to deal with them again at some point in the future, and boy have I had to deal with them these last few weeks.

At the beginning of the month, I recognized a familiar burning pain in my lower back, radiating up my right side. I tried to convince myself that I just pulled something, but it got worse and worse until I was worried that I would be beyond the point of being able to drive myself to the hospital, so I hopped (carefully) into my car and drove over the the ER. One ultrasound later, my fears were confirmed and I was told I had a large stone lodged in my right kidney, close to the entrance to my bladder. The doctor said there wasn't much that could be done right then and there short of prescribing a cocktail of meds and scheduling a visit with a urologist in 2 weeks. Hopefully one of the meds would help me pass the stone naturally in the mean time. I went home and managed to get an hour or so of miserable sleep, and over the next few days, I slowly got better. I didn't even have to dip into the prescription for Vicodin the doctor gave me.

By the time my urologist visit came around, the only real residual pain I was feeling was an annoying sharp pinching pain in my bladder. I got a CT scan and I was told I'd get a call to determine the next step once the doctor could look at the results. That was Monday the 18th. By that night, as my luck would have it, I was feeling that back pain coming back with a vengeance. This time it was more severe and now both my sides were on fire, plus it felt like someone was making balloon animals out of my bladder. So back to the ER I went, and they sent me for a CT scan right away. Up until that point, writhing around was my only respite against the pain, so being forced to lie still for the scan was Hell. After a short wait which took ages, a doctor came to see me and told me that the stone had moved, and now they could actually see 2 different stones; one smaller stone way up in my left kidney, and a behemoth hanging out near the passage between my right kidney and my bladder. This stone could not be passed and would need to be broken into smaller pieces and removed surgically. I dubbed it the Black Knight.

Not exactly what I was hoping to hear, especially when I learned that it would be Friday before I could get in for surgery. There is no comfortable way to sit, stand, or lie down in order to feel better when you have kidney stones, there is only the pain. Waves and waves of nauseating pain in my lower back, lancing up my sides, and even into my groin. Every muscle feels tense and twisted, with spasms constantly. My body wanted these foreign objects out, and I was in total agreement. Up until this point I had been able to avoid taking any of the prescribed Vicodin, instead electing for a handful of Ibuprofen and Tylenol every 6 hours, but Monday was a Vicodin day. I managed to avoid it for the rest of the week, and by Friday morning, I was starting to feel optimistic about my anticipated recovery. The doctor said the procedure would be routine and that recovery wouldn't be so bad. After all, the surgery wouldn't involve any incisions (I'll let you imagine how they get the stones out).

I will tell you that the doctor was a damn liar, which I found out abruptly the first time I took a piss after the surgery. I hobbled over to the bathroom, feeling kind of positive about how little pain I felt in my sides at that moment, but as soon as I started pissing, it felt like pipe cleaners were being yanked out of my urethra. My dick just shrank an inch thinking about it again. The pain made me regret being an Atheist. It took every ounce of control I had to not stop pissing and just keep going until I emptied the tank. A tank, mind you, filled with what looked to be pure blood. Oh, and blood clots, as I would discover once I got home. Nice long ropey blood clots that reminded me of CaseDogg.

The doctor assured me this was totally normal, that the pain would subside, and I would forget all about this by the end of the weekend. Ha. I won't belabor the point, suffice it to say that the recovery has been a bit slower and I'm only just now able to sit upright in an office chair for longer than a few minutes without horrible pain. Actually, I think I'm going to go lie down again.

Drink lots of water. Don't get kidney stones.

[Whiskey 7]

Wonderful story and I feel for you pain.. Thankfully I do drink lots of fluid*

*Glass of wine in hand and about 30 minutes to dinner here.

[shaft]

holy shit.

*drinks water*

[Eraser]

Jesus, that sucks. Good luck with the rest of the recovery.
I chuckled at the Casedogg reference though

[Eraser]

Vicodin Ibuprofen Tylenol

Sorry to hijack the thread, but there's something I'm wondering about.
I get the impression that Americans have a far bigger vocabulary when it comes to medical drug names/brands than Europeans have. For Americans, it seems fairly normal to say "the doctor gave me X", where X is the name of a drug, whereas European people tend to say "the doctor gave me pain killers". I understand that in the US, pharmaceutical companies are allowed to make commercials for their prescription drugs (they aren't here). Is that perhaps the reason? Are you all exposed to many drug names over there and is it actually normal to talk about prescription drugs in such specific terms over there?

[Κracus]

Yikes, good luck dude... I need to start drinking more water. All I drink is beer and energy drinks...

[scared?]

The op is gonna get a staghorn calculi and I'm gonna ROFL about it... :olo: ...

[Eraser]

At least Transient still has both of his balls

[scared?]

Wow another moron that fell for the act... How cute...

[Captain]

I always stay active and drink lots of fluids to avoid exactly this kind of shit. Glad you're doing better dude.

[Κracus]

Yeah but you're an asshole. I'd rather have kidney stones.

[YourGrandpa]

Now I only drink water throughout the week. A few beers in the evenings (Friday through Sunday). Gave up drinking sodas years ago (except for as a mixer in the rare jack and diet). Occasionally I'll have a Vitamin Water or Gatorade. Luckily I've never had a kidney stone.

Hopefully you feel better soon.

[Captain]

Yeah but you're an asshole. I'd rather have kidney stones.

Aww, are you gonna be ok? Guess a bunch of text years ago on an online messageboard really got to you





:olo:

[Transient]

Vicodin Ibuprofen Tylenol

Sorry to hijack the thread, but there's something I'm wondering about.
I get the impression that Americans have a far bigger vocabulary when it comes to medical drug names/brands than Europeans have. For Americans, it seems fairly normal to say "the doctor gave me X", where X is the name of a drug, whereas European people tend to say "the doctor gave me pain killers". I understand that in the US, pharmaceutical companies are allowed to make commercials for their prescription drugs (they aren't here). Is that perhaps the reason? Are you all exposed to many drug names over there and is it actually normal to talk about prescription drugs in such specific terms over there?

I don't know about other people, but I was specific with the names because I watch/read news about the opioid epidemic in America all the time and I'm wary of narcotics. But the doctors who gave me the prescriptions were also deliberate with the names they used, mostly because of the interactions between the drugs. Tylenol is just the brand name for acetaminophen, and because it can have bad effects on your liver, you shouldn't take too much of it. Ibuprofen doesn't have acetaminophen in it, so if your pain is severe enough, you can take both without fucking your body up. Vicodin (or the generic Hydrocodone which I took) has acetaminophen in it and is way stronger. Several of the drugs I was prescribed were referred to by the doctors by their brand name, but I was given a generic version of it all. So the marketing definitely sticks with them.

I was actually kind of surprised at how nonchalantly the narcotic prescription was handled. I wasn't warned about how dangerous it could be when mixed with alcohol, nor how it could become addictive. I just got a pamphlet of facts and stuff when I picked it up from the pharmacy, but how many people actually read those? I remember a year or so ago when I had a wisdom tooth removed, I got a prescription for Hydrocodone without even asking for it. After the procedure, the doctor just handed me the prescription and told me to take it if the pain got bad. I asked him if over-the-counter pain meds would suffice and he said "probably, but better be safe than sorry". So he was perfectly fine giving me a full prescription I probably didn't need for a deadly narcotic like it was candy. That's how that shit gets into the community and causes opioid problems in rural America. I could have sold it to someone in town and made a decent buck, I never was in enough pain to need it myself. :disgust:

At least the doctors at the hospital only gave me a prescription for 8 pills, and my pain was actually bad enough that I used 2-3 of them. But my dentist gave me a prescription for 30. They're still sitting in my medicine cabinet, I need to take them to the hospital so they can dispose of them properly. I don't want that shit going down the drain and making its way into a water supply somewhere. :down:

[dekayd]

Hope you get well soon Transient!
Thank you for your story.

[Scourge]

Had a few. They're not fun.

[scared?]

Real men don't get kidney stones...

[seremtan]

well shit

glad all that tea-drinking i do is good for something other than giving me an excuse to get away from my desk every hour

(in before someone tells me tea-drinking doesn't hydrate like water. it does)

btw Trans do they use ultrasound to break up the stones?

[Transient]

Nope, I had a ureteroscopy. Ultrasound wasn't an option because of the size and location of the stones. They sent a long multipurpose cable up my peehole with a combination camera/laser/grabber on the end. It was an outpatient procedure and I was only knocked out for about 2 hours. First the doctor looked around with the camera and found a stone, then the laser was used to break it into tiny pieces, and finally the grabber was used to clamp down on the little bits and they were pulled out a few clumps at a time. I was told that the ureteroscope had the diameter of a pencil, so I'm glad I wasn't awake for that. :dts:

It went off without a hitch, thank Christ, because if my kidney tubes had been too inflamed they would have had to put in a stent, which would have required a 2nd procedure to remove. I was told that the stent would have been attached to a string that would have dangled out of my dong and to remove it, they'd just tug on the string and pull it out with me awake.

The camera feed was live, not recorded, so I can't see what the doctor saw. But I'm gonna head over the the Radiology department next week and see if I can get a copy of the CT scans. I'm curious about what the stones looked like. I imagine they looked something like the >:D icon, horns and all.

[Whiskey 7]

A great story and the detail

...and we need pics

[seremtan]

>piece of string hanging out your japeye

nope.jpg.wav.exe

[Scourge]

well shit

glad all that tea-drinking i do is good for something other than giving me an excuse to get away from my desk every hour

(in before someone tells me tea-drinking doesn't hydrate like water. it does)

btw Trans do they use ultrasound to break up the stones?

Tea is also thought to be bad for kidney stones.

[scared?]

Life is bad for ppl with kidney stones...

[xer0s]

I like people who don’t get kidney stones...

[scared?]

MAGA bitches...