Κracus wrote:I once beat a guy as I was talking to the cops on the phone. I know it sounds like I make this shit up but I'm dead serious.
He broke into my apartment, came back the next week to do it again but didn't know I was home. Left, and tried to break into someone elses house at which point I was on the phone with the cops and when he came out I caught him, bounced his face off the sidewalk while talking to the dispatcher the entire time. The whole situation was hilarious really, I had the guy with my foot on his neck while pulling the backpack he had stolen from me the previous week off him. If you can picture this, he's face first on the sidewalk with me with one foot on his back and his arms are completed trapped backwards because of the straps on the backpack. Fun times.
I once stabbed a man in the eye, no shit.
Few years back I was flat on my arse, jobless and next to homeless then I met this guy, lets call him Joe, top lad, made friends and he helped me out to get back on my feet, gave me a place to stay, bit of money to tide me over and sorted me out with some work but the thing is Joe had a Mrs. Anyway after about 6 months me and his Mrs start gettting it on, for about 3 years we were bouncing each other all round the house and we really liked each other until 1 day Joe came home and caught us at it, he fucking flipped and nearly broke my jaw so I just grabbed the fork from the fondue I was munching and jabbed him in the eye, not long after the police turn up and took him away, leaving me in the house with his mrs. After a few days go by he turns up, cotton patch on his eye ranting and laughing about how he was shagging some other bird across town before walking back out, if it hadnt been for cotton eye joe id been married long time ago, where did you come from and where did you go ?, where did you come from cotton eye Joe ?
[color=red] . : [/color][size=85] You knows you knows [/size]
