*~ANIMAL WISH THREAD~*

Post by **mjrpes** » Mon May 09, 2005 7:26 am

If I could be any animal I would want to be a dolphin. Dolphins are really cool. Dolphins are mammals. Mammals are animals that live on earth. Did you know that people are mammals too? Dolphins are mammals, but they are special because they live in the WATER! They breath by going to the surface and using a hole on the top if their head to take in air. Dolphins also are really good swimmers. They can swim all day long and you can see them following ships! Dolphins like to be around people, because they make sounds with their voice when they follow ships. They must be telling us how much they like to swim! My teacher says that dolphins can do flips. I find that really cool so I must say that I really like dophins a lot! Dolphins are also really friendly. Did you know you can pleasure a dolphin? Male dolphins, I find, tend to prefer the base of the penis to be gently massaged and squeezed, as well as gently rubbed along it's length. It doesn't take long for the male to ejaculate, around 40 seconds to a minute, and this is usually accompanied by either shuddering just prior to ejaculating, and thrusting and tail-arching during ejaculation. The force of ejaculation can be powerful at times, so it is best to keep your face out of the line of fire, or keep his member underwater. You can attempt to lick and suck on the end of it while masturbating as well, but be warned, do not try to give full throat, and get the hell out of the way before he ejaculates! So in conclusion if I could be any animal I would want to be a dolphin!

Post by **Grudge** » Mon May 09, 2005 7:35 am

I'd like to be this one

Post by **feedback** » Mon May 09, 2005 8:01 am

lol nice find Grudge, keep up the good work

Post by **SplishSplash** » Mon May 09, 2005 9:23 am

I'd be a dolphin.

I'd still be kind of intelligent, have lots of fun in the water and get to fuck treehugger girls who want to get "in touch with nature".

Post by **MKJ** » Mon May 09, 2005 9:36 am

platypi is where its at, bitches

Post by **Geebs** » Mon May 09, 2005 10:23 am

I'd be a gerbil because I fucking love celebrities

Post by **Pauly** » Mon May 09, 2005 10:34 am

I like being Human because we eat animals. I wouldn't want to end up on feedback's dinner plate, and then be shit out of his arse.

Post by **seremtan** » Mon May 09, 2005 10:40 am

Headcrab.

Post by **MaCaBr3** » Mon May 09, 2005 1:37 pm

Post by **Jackal** » Mon May 09, 2005 3:19 pm

YourGrandpa wrote:I'd be a bear. One of those big grizzly mother fuckers. Imagine a 9 ft. tall, talking bear. You'd be rich and could take a shit anywhere you wanted.

I guess a bear is ok if that's all you really want to settle for. Because my lifestyle affords me a little more breathing room in life though I'd have to be a giraffe. None of that eating of the leaves that all the other animals get, no no, I want the ones at the tops of the trees. I mean a bear is fine if that's all you can afford but I definately choose giraffe.

Post by **Doombrain** » Mon May 09, 2005 3:50 pm

Jackal wrote:
YourGrandpa wrote:I'd be a bear. One of those big grizzly mother fuckers. Imagine a 9 ft. tall, talking bear. You'd be rich and could take a shit anywhere you wanted.
I guess a bear is ok if that's all you really want to settle for. Because my lifestyle affords me a little more breathing room in live though I'd have to be a giraffe. None of that eating of the leaves that all the other animals get, no no, I want the ones at the tops of the trees. I mean a bear is fine if that's all you can afford but I definately choose giraffe.

Giraffe’s ok if it’s all you can afford I guess. I’m going with a rare bird of pray, or some shit.

Post by **Dark Metal** » Mon May 09, 2005 3:56 pm

Doombrain wrote:
Jackal wrote:
YourGrandpa wrote:I'd be a bear. One of those big grizzly mother fuckers. Imagine a 9 ft. tall, talking bear. You'd be rich and could take a shit anywhere you wanted.
I guess a bear is ok if that's all you really want to settle for. Because my lifestyle affords me a little more breathing room in live though I'd have to be a giraffe. None of that eating of the leaves that all the other animals get, no no, I want the ones at the tops of the trees. I mean a bear is fine if that's all you can afford but I definately choose giraffe.
Giraffe’s ok if it’s all you can afford I guess. I’m going with a rare bird of pray, or some shit.

I'd go with Peregrine Falcon. Bad ass bird.

Post by **Doombrain** » Mon May 09, 2005 4:03 pm

Dark Metal wrote:
Doombrain wrote:
Jackal wrote: I guess a bear is ok if that's all you really want to settle for. Because my lifestyle affords me a little more breathing room in live though I'd have to be a giraffe. None of that eating of the leaves that all the other animals get, no no, I want the ones at the tops of the trees. I mean a bear is fine if that's all you can afford but I definately choose giraffe.
Giraffe’s ok if it’s all you can afford I guess. I’m going with a rare bird of pray, or some shit.

I'd go with Peregrine Falcon. Bad ass bird.

's ok if it's all you can afford. I’m going with a gold and diamond plated golden eagle with AMD lasers and Rolls Royse jets.

Post by **bitWISE** » Mon May 09, 2005 5:06 pm

Doombrain wrote:
Dark Metal wrote:
Doombrain wrote: Giraffe’s ok if it’s all you can afford I guess. I’m going with a rare bird of pray, or some shit.

I'd go with Peregrine Falcon. Bad ass bird.
's ok if it's all you can afford. I’m going with a gold and diamond plated golden eagle with AMD lasers and Rolls Royse jets.

Holy shit dude. I just laughed out loud in the computer lab and made an ass of myself.

Post by **Geebs** » Mon May 09, 2005 5:12 pm

I'd be a turtle. I'd abandon my offspring and fuck off to surf the Web for conspiracy theories.

Post by **Billy Bellend** » Mon May 09, 2005 6:00 pm

not juyst any mouse

a cotton mouse yea

Post by **[xeno]Julios** » Mon May 09, 2005 9:21 pm

bonobos if i wanted lots of sex

dolphin/orca if i wanted lots of fun, sex, and good hunting

tiger just to see what i could do (i'd hunt down hot human women and play with them - mebe give em a good lickin)

shark just to see what it's like to be a perfect hunter

eagle would be awesome

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Tue May 10, 2005 1:56 am

Damn that's a good question. When you were 5. Fuck off retards.

Post by **mjrpes** » Tue May 10, 2005 2:22 am

Kracus wrote:Damn that's a good question. When you were 5. Fuck off retards.

Gee, sounds like someone's got a case of the mondays.

Post by **+JuggerNaut+** » Tue May 10, 2005 2:29 am

mjrpes wrote:
Kracus wrote:Damn that's a good question. When you were 5. Fuck off retards.
Gee, sounds like someone's got a case of the mondays.

everyday would be a monday to you if worked at a call center, had stoners for bosses, and posted here all day talking about your various weapons stashed throughout your spartan bedroom.

Post by **mjrpes** » Tue May 10, 2005 2:34 am

+JuggerNaut+ wrote:
everyday would be a monday to you if worked at a call center, had stoners for bosses, and posted here all day talking about your various weapons stashed throughout your spartan bedroom.

Maybe Kracus got that one bad phone call. That's all you need to ruin your day. One bad call. You get that call at 9:01am, and you'll act like a dick for the rest of the day. I don't think I could handle a job like that. Way too much pressure.

Post by **+JuggerNaut+** » Tue May 10, 2005 2:39 am

yeah, boy that job is intense i'm sure. talk about the burden of responsibility that comes with a position like that. unfathomable.

Post by **Ryoki** » Tue May 10, 2005 8:17 am

I choose to be a sloth, for relax purposes.

Post by **DiscoDave** » Tue May 10, 2005 1:37 pm

Sloth or a Yak.

As Ryoki has said, for the relax purposes, but a yak for the humor of the name, and the sound.

YYYYAAAAAAAKKKKKKK

Post by **Tormentius** » Tue May 10, 2005 5:06 pm

I'd choose an orca or a tiger.