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Posted: Mon Jul 23, 2007 2:00 am
by Magnus
riddla wrote:sliver wrote:Transformers: 5/10
Jesus fucking god. I am not being a film buff elitist here -- I like mindless action as much as the next guy -- but this was on a level with Aliesn Vs Predator. Interesting visuals (not mind-blowing, just cool), everything else as terrible as it could possibly be. I think I groaned after at least 33% of the lines. Just painful.
EDIT: And don't give me the "well people see it for the action" crap. I saw Shooter, and it was a terrible film too but at least the characters spoke like human beings. This was worse than saturday morning cartoon dialogue. Over the Hedge certainly had better screenwriting than this. Ren and Stimpy have better fucking dialogue than this. The Emperor's New Groove, just as one example, is proof that a movie intended for kids can still have interesting, listenable dialogue. This was just absolute shite. It's Michael Bay; he gets the budget he wants to make the movies he wants. Bad Boys 2 was no The Big Sleep, it sure wasnt the Maltese Falcon or Cat on a Hot Tin Roof, but the lines worked. The actors had a clue. This was completely missing from Transformers and it ruined what could have been a good summer blockbuster. Pirates 2 and 3? Bloated CGI-heavy motherfuckers, but completely watchable. This? Not at all. Turn off your hearing aid and close your eyes till the guy beside you pops wood at the next fight scene. And I didn't even find the fight scenes particularly impressive, beyond watching all the stuff that WASN'T cgi and imagining the work that went into making it all move and explode etc. to coincide perfectly with the SFX that didn't exist until far, far later in the production process.
I have to agree; pretty disappointed that Speilberg didn't crack the whip when he read this shit-tastic script.
That pisses me off to no end. When a movie is hyped to be so friggin awesome and people actually act like they are pumped to see it and it comes out and is shitty in one way or another the makers should be obligated by law to listen to the complaints and then remake the damn movie!
Posted: Mon Jul 23, 2007 3:51 am
by dzjepp
Transformers
8/10
Posted: Mon Jul 23, 2007 4:17 am
by A1yssa
Transformers...
exagerated conversions(old transformer toys were simpler and looked more real), too fast action(most of the time you're not understanding what is happening), a robot that pisses???? a mobile phone that became a robot(with no hardware/gears inside)???
It looks really unreal!
6/10
I expect MORE from spielberg+bay...
Someone know the name of the song palyed during the firsth engage between bumblebee and the cop car?
Posted: Mon Jul 23, 2007 8:17 am
by MKJ
the mobilephone becoming a robot thing is directly from the comics btw
(that is, the concept of the allspark n all)
Posted: Mon Jul 23, 2007 8:22 am
by Grudge
sliver wrote:Beowulf
Have you seen the older version with Christopher Lambert?
Posted: Mon Jul 23, 2007 8:29 am
by Captain
sliver wrote:Beowulf & Grendel: 8/10
I absolutely loved it, the acting was just flawless and the landscape was indeed breathtaking. It was also amazing how as the movie progressed, you could see Grendel becoming more and more human (not that he wasn't to begin with), rather than the monstrous beast he was perceived to be.
As for the new version that's coming out, is it going to be in a Final Fantasy style CGI animation? I'd see it just for Angelina's voice
Nightshade wrote:Captain Mazda wrote:
War of the Worlds - 8/10
wtf? NO MAZDA, NO. That movie was a complete shitfest.
Heh, it had some flaws surely, but I still liked it. Apart from some of the useless dialogue and the boring ending, I was delighted with the special effects. The tripods were absolutely fantastic and it's an enjoyable movie if you're in the mood for mindless action every now and then. Also, it's the only Tom Cruise movie I've ever willingly watched.
Posted: Mon Jul 23, 2007 11:18 pm
by sliver
Grudge wrote:sliver wrote:Beowulf
Have you seen the older version with Christopher Lambert?
heh, no, is it worth checking out? (Good old Highlander/Rayden...)
Posted: Tue Jul 24, 2007 8:10 am
by Grudge
Well, actually it's one of the worst films I've ever seen, but it's interesting in a train wreck kind of way.
For example, they realized that Grendel looked too bad (basically just a guy in a rubber suit), so they decided to add some kind of blur on top of him in every scene in post-production, which looks really strange.
Posted: Tue Jul 24, 2007 8:44 am
by Doombrain
shaft wrote:wb doombrain
relax.
Posted: Tue Jul 24, 2007 11:42 am
by Jackal
A1yssa wrote:Transformers...
exagerated conversions(old transformer toys were simpler and looked more real), too fast action(most of the time you're not understanding what is happening), a robot that pisses???? a mobile phone that became a robot(with no hardware/gears inside)???
It looks really unreal!
6/10
I expect MORE from spielberg+bay...
Someone know the name of the song palyed during the firsth engage between bumblebee and the cop car?
This is a terrible review. "Exagerated", "too fast action", "unreal"? TRANSFORMERS. GIANT ALIEN ROBOTS FROM OUTERSPACE THAT TURN INTO VEHICLES.
Posted: Tue Jul 24, 2007 11:52 am
by o'dium
I have to agree with Cuntle here...
You go and watch a film based on giant robots from space, which was based on a kids cartoon...
What did you expect, Schindler's List?
Just sit back and enjoy over 2 hours of CGI robots beating the shit out of each other, because you would be dumb to think it could be more than that.
Posted: Tue Jul 24, 2007 11:56 am
by Nightshade
"Cuntle"? For fuck's sake, that's a HORRIBLE HORRIBLE attempt at a nick flame.
SHAME ON YOU O'DIUM. SHAME.
Posted: Tue Jul 24, 2007 11:57 am
by o'dium
I feel... Dark...
Not dark skinned mind, never that bad...
Posted: Tue Jul 24, 2007 1:51 pm
by R00k
sliver wrote:Transformers: 5/10
Jesus fucking god. I am not being a film buff elitist here -- I like mindless action as much as the next guy -- but this was on a level with Aliesn Vs Predator. Interesting visuals (not mind-blowing, just cool), everything else as terrible as it could possibly be. I think I groaned after at least 33% of the lines. Just painful.
EDIT: And don't give me the "well people see it for the action" crap. I saw Shooter, and it was a terrible film too but at least the characters spoke like human beings. This was worse than saturday morning cartoon dialogue. Over the Hedge certainly had better screenwriting than this. Ren and Stimpy have better fucking dialogue than this. The Emperor's New Groove, just as one example, is proof that a movie intended for kids can still have interesting, listenable dialogue. This was just absolute shite. It's Michael Bay; he gets the budget he wants to make the movies he wants. Bad Boys 2 was no The Big Sleep, it sure wasnt the Maltese Falcon or Cat on a Hot Tin Roof, but the lines worked. The actors had a clue. This was completely missing from Transformers and it ruined what could have been a good summer blockbuster. Pirates 2 and 3? Bloated CGI-heavy motherfuckers, but completely watchable. This? Not at all. Turn off your hearing aid and close your eyes till the guy beside you pops wood at the next fight scene. And I didn't even find the fight scenes particularly impressive, beyond watching all the stuff that WASN'T cgi and imagining the work that went into making it all move and explode etc. to coincide perfectly with the SFX that didn't exist until far, far later in the production process.
You really thought the dialog in Bad Boys 2 was better than in Transformers?
Wow.
Posted: Wed Jul 25, 2007 6:48 am
by Cooldown
Spiderman 3 - 7/10
Fantastic Four: Rise of the Silver Surfer - 5/10 (hope they follow thru w/ a SS movie)
Shooter - 6/10
Posted: Wed Jul 25, 2007 7:49 am
by A1yssa
Jackal wrote:A1yssa wrote:Transformers...
exagerated conversions(old transformer toys were simpler and looked more real), too fast action(most of the time you're not understanding what is happening), a robot that pisses???? a mobile phone that became a robot(with no hardware/gears inside)???
It looks really unreal!
6/10
I expect MORE from spielberg+bay...
Someone know the name of the song palyed during the firsth engage between bumblebee and the cop car?
This is a terrible review. "Exagerated", "too fast action", "unreal"? TRANSFORMERS. GIANT geoff ROBOTS FROM OUTERSPACE THAT TURN INTO VEHICLES.
My eng is terrible...I know, I"m sorry...it was not intended as a review...I just said what and why a did not like the movie.
Posted: Wed Jul 25, 2007 10:15 am
by Grudge
Posted: Wed Jul 25, 2007 10:19 am
by Grudge
Fantastic Four: Rise of the Silver Surfer - 4/10
Shallow, meaningless, silly and botched use of the Silver Surfer. Meh.
Posted: Wed Jul 25, 2007 10:32 am
by Massive Quasars
I watched Die Hard instead of Transformers. Wasn't too bad really.
Posted: Wed Jul 25, 2007 9:19 pm
by sliver
R00k wrote:You really thought the dialog in Bad Boys 2 was better than in Transformers? Wow.
"Wow" yourself. Bad Boys 2 had the undeniably charismatic Will Smith, the undeniably ridiculous Martin Lawrence, and the undeniably awesome Peter Stormare, so no script can reduce that to zero, even with shitty overblown direction and MTV editing.
Every single fucking line in Transformers was awful. I have never heard of a worse screenplay except maybe AVP. (BB2 was no gem: I remember "Are you a cop or a model?" "Don't hate the playa, hate the game." But fuck, at least it sounds like something a crazy black fashionista detective might say in some movieworld, which is a lot more realism than I got from any single line in Transformers.) The fact that you disagree with me convinces me that you have no idea how literate people talk. Watch "The Birds" -- the opening (pet shop) scene is one of the best-written scenes of dialogue ever put to film. The same goes for my personal favourite, Bogart & Bacall's first meeting the The Big Sleep.
The BB2 screenplay sure as fuck wasn't Jane Eyre, but I think it was measurably, provably, empirically much better than the Transformers screenplay.
EDIT: Also, ana
log, dia
logue.
Posted: Wed Jul 25, 2007 9:22 pm
by Grudge
One of the guys who wrote the Catwoman and the Core screenplays co-wrote the Transformers one. 'nuff said.
Posted: Wed Jul 25, 2007 9:26 pm
by sliver
I would like to add that the cowriters of Bad Boys 2 were --
1. Jerry Stahl, a novelist who was on the team that wrote Twin Peaks, one of the shows hailed for bringing good writing to TV series, in the form of extremely good (complex) plotting, nuanced character arcs, and storylines that spanned multiple seasons. He also wrote for CSI.
2. Ron Shelton, who wrote Bull Durham (I dare r00k to tell me that's a crappy script, because it's pretty widely liked, even though personally I thought the famous Kevin Costner speech sounded stupid), White Men Can't Jump, Dark Blue, and Hollywood Homicide.
Again, no Nobel Prize winners, but you're comparing that to Catwoman and The Core? fuck off.
Posted: Wed Jul 25, 2007 9:34 pm
by sliver
Grudge wrote:Fantastic Four: Rise of the Silver Surfer - 4/10
Shallow, meaningless, silly and botched use of the Silver Surfer. Meh.
It looked absolutely appalling as a movie, but Jessica Alba's hot and the Silver Surfer effects looked neat. Worth seeing purely for those two reasons, or no?
Posted: Wed Jul 25, 2007 9:34 pm
by Fjoggs
You can't really base your argument on previous achievements. The script in bad boys does what it's supposed to. It's not meant to be breathtaking.
Posted: Wed Jul 25, 2007 9:34 pm
by Dave
Bad Boys 2 was ballin'. I especially liked Joe Pantoliano as the captain. You don't watch those films for their strong plots...
