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Topic Starter Topic: What's worse?

rep
rep
Joined: 29 Aug 2002
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PostPosted: 06-26-2005 02:22 PM           Profile Send private message  E-mail  Edit post Reply with quote


1. Ricochit: When during dejection a poopy enters the water in a way that splashes water back up onto your asshole?

2. The Morrison: When the toilet paper is weak and your finger(s) break on through to the other side?

3. Red Cocktober: When your meat accidentally is submerged in the water?

4. Snake Tongue: The piss that gets all over the place, usually caused by a night of rough intercourse?

5. Me?



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social engineer
social engineer
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PostPosted: 06-26-2005 02:30 PM           Profile Send private message  E-mail  Edit post Reply with quote


f*cking A, that's a tough list.




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social engineer
social engineer
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PostPosted: 06-26-2005 02:30 PM           Profile Send private message  E-mail  Edit post Reply with quote


I'm going for a jog over by the new stadium, i'll get back to you.




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rep
rep
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PostPosted: 06-26-2005 02:34 PM           Profile Send private message  E-mail  Edit post Reply with quote


Don't I know it. Snake tongue isn't a problem unless you're in a girl's house. Then it's a big mess... Literally.

Ricochit can ruin your day. It destroys confidence almost as much as Duhard destroys the Crash bot.

The Morrison is bad if you're about to sit down for a meal because even though you'll properly wash your hands (hopefully) it'll be in the back of your mind and your ability to enjoy the meal will be hampered by the fact that you're trying to not use that finger.

Red Cocktober is bad too because nomatter what you can't have sex until you take a really long shower and soak in the tub for an hour. Who wants head knowing that you'll have to make out with her in a bit when she's got dungwater on her mouth?



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rep
rep
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PostPosted: 06-26-2005 02:35 PM           Profile Send private message  E-mail  Edit post Reply with quote


+JuggerNaut+ wrote:
I'm going for a jog over by the new stadium, i'll get back to you.


I was just by there the other day. How much you wanna bet someone (or an animal) gets seriously injured by the field when they pull it outside?

Edit: Since people probably don't know what I'm talking about, here's a picture.

Image

The football field comes out of the stadium... Pimp my arena.

"The 152,000 square-foot concrete stadium floor will have a utility grid embedded in the floor and can host various events like trade and consumer shows, conventions, concerts, motor sports and rodeos.
The grass field remains outside the stadium in the sun until game day getting the maximum amount of sunshine and nourishment, eliminating humidity problems inside the stadium and providing unrestricted access to the stadium floor for events and staging."

No doubt they'll have Wrestlemania 25 and Superbowl XLII is going to be there in 2008.



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Last edited by rep on 06-26-2005 02:41 PM, edited 1 time in total.

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Arrr?
Arrr?
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PostPosted: 06-26-2005 02:40 PM           Profile Send private message  E-mail  Edit post Reply with quote


1. Don't have that problem anymore. I drop a single square of toilet paper into the john just before I side down.

2. Never had it happen.

3. The water in the bowl doesn't get high enough for that to ever happen to me.

4. I sit down if I think that will happen, which is inoften. :tear:

So I guess that means #4.




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PostPosted: 06-26-2005 02:46 PM           Profile Send private message  E-mail  Edit post Reply with quote


Transient wrote:
inoften

wtf




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Arrr?
Arrr?
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PostPosted: 06-26-2005 02:49 PM           Profile Send private message  E-mail  Edit post Reply with quote


Typo. Meant unoften (obviously).



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plained
plained
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PostPosted: 06-26-2005 02:49 PM           Profile Send private message  E-mail  Edit post Reply with quote


another flake'd out topy :lol:




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It felt good...
It felt good...
Joined: 28 Mar 2001
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PostPosted: 06-26-2005 02:51 PM           Profile   Send private message  E-mail  Edit post Reply with quote


Probably the snake tongue. I'm too lazy to clean up after the fire hydrant gets loose and out of control. I don't give a fuck.




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rep
rep
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PostPosted: 06-26-2005 02:51 PM           Profile Send private message  E-mail  Edit post Reply with quote


So you leave pee all over your bathroom floor?



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It felt good...
It felt good...
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PostPosted: 06-26-2005 02:53 PM           Profile   Send private message  E-mail  Edit post Reply with quote


Yes.




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Banned
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PostPosted: 06-26-2005 03:04 PM           Profile Send private message  E-mail  Edit post Reply with quote


Snake tongue can be helped by squeezing a bit, opening your urethra a bit more. Sometimes that's no good and you need to sort of squat over the pisser though, or sit down.



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rep
rep
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PostPosted: 06-26-2005 03:28 PM           Profile Send private message  E-mail  Edit post Reply with quote


You mean squeezing with your fingers on the top and bottom near the tip, right? That works sometimes.

Leaning forward to try to avoid ricochit just makes it worse. Sometimes that causes ricochit that runs down your taint.



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social engineer
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PostPosted: 06-26-2005 04:36 PM           Profile Send private message  E-mail  Edit post Reply with quote


rep wrote:
1. Ricochit: When during dejection a poopy enters the water in a way that splashes water back up onto your asshole?

2. The Morrison: When the toilet paper is weak and your finger(s) break on through to the other side?

3. Red Cocktober: When your meat accidentally is submerged in the water?

4. Snake Tongue: The piss that gets all over the place, usually caused by a night of rough intercourse?

5. Me?


1) is prolly the worst. you're less of a man for a moment when it happens.

2) lol@ "the morrison". that doesn't happen, ever. ok, maybe once. two ply all the time and doubled over just in case.

3) i duct tape my c*ck to my inner thigh. that's the only way.

4) at home, i always kneel at the john and piss. avoids any "splash damage".


p.s. yeah, animals will be the ones that get hurt there the most.




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social engineer
social engineer
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PostPosted: 06-26-2005 04:37 PM           Profile Send private message  E-mail  Edit post Reply with quote


..and the Cards will still suck.




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orphan of war
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PostPosted: 06-26-2005 05:12 PM           Profile Send private message  E-mail  Edit post Reply with quote





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Pestilence
Pestilence
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PostPosted: 06-26-2005 05:13 PM           Profile Send private message  E-mail  Edit post Reply with quote


A shit thread without Julios? Blasphemy.




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Don't be koi
Don't be koi
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PostPosted: 06-26-2005 05:18 PM           Profile Send private message  E-mail  Edit post Reply with quote


How about having to assume a three-point-stance after waking with morning wood and a strong urge to piss? That one gets me at least once a month.




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PostPosted: 06-26-2005 05:21 PM           Profile Send private message  E-mail  Edit post Reply with quote


l0g1c wrote:
How about having to assume a three-point-stance after waking with morning wood and a strong urge to piss? That one gets me at least once a month.


Its hard to aim, happens to me like every day. I gotta walk it off first.




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Pestilence
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PostPosted: 06-26-2005 05:22 PM           Profile Send private message  E-mail  Edit post Reply with quote


Youth. :smirk:




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Let's Get Serious!
Let's Get Serious!
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PostPosted: 06-26-2005 05:25 PM           Profile Send private message  E-mail  Edit post Reply with quote


+JuggerNaut+ wrote:
..and the Cards will still suck.
how sad :lol:




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Banned
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PostPosted: 06-26-2005 05:27 PM           Profile Send private message  E-mail  Edit post Reply with quote


rep wrote:
You mean squeezing with your fingers on the top and bottom near the tip, right? That works sometimes.


Yup.

rep wrote:
Leaning forward to try to avoid ricochit just makes it worse. Sometimes that causes ricochit that runs down your taint.


Never had that problem, needs to be done at an angle to the water to prevent nasty splashback.



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Insane Quaker
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PostPosted: 06-26-2005 05:28 PM           Profile Send private message  E-mail  Edit post Reply with quote


I dont have trouble with Snake Tongue, my Parents used to put a ping pong ball in the Bowl so I could practice my aim when I was growing up. Now I'm a great shot, everytime.




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Truffle Shuffle
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PostPosted: 06-26-2005 05:28 PM           Profile Send private message  E-mail  Edit post Reply with quote


6 - when you go to lay some cable and strike oil >:E



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Banned
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PostPosted: 06-26-2005 05:32 PM           Profile Send private message  E-mail  Edit post Reply with quote


Brian Slade wrote:
I dont have trouble with Snake Tongue, my Parents used to put a ping pong ball in the Bowl so I could practice my aim when I was growing up. Now I'm a great shot, everytime.


I get my practise with chewing gum in urinals, I can hit a piece of Wrigley's from 20 paces with my golden arc.



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Will Hench for Food
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PostPosted: 06-26-2005 05:43 PM           Profile Send private message  E-mail  Edit post Reply with quote


On a slightly different note, the real worst is when you've got absolutely shitfaced, had a long shag, nipped to the bathroom afterwards for a quick piss and found out you're in retention. It's happened to me twice.....




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Banned
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PostPosted: 06-26-2005 05:56 PM           Profile Send private message  E-mail  Edit post Reply with quote


We've both decided on a number of occasions that we needed to piss quickly just before anything's happened, not a problem aside from forcing Bob to point at the water.



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Will Hench for Food
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PostPosted: 06-26-2005 05:59 PM           Profile Send private message  E-mail  Edit post Reply with quote


Ah, well, you see it's embarassing when you're with someone you barely know, say "I'm just nipping to the bathroom", and then get stuck there for a quarter of an hour trying to force out the first drop. Doesn't make you seem like a wierdo, nosiree




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rep
rep
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PostPosted: 06-26-2005 06:04 PM           Profile Send private message  E-mail  Edit post Reply with quote


losCHUNK wrote:
6 - when you go to lay some cable and strike oil >:E


So since this is a bathroom thread, you're saying you have sex in the men's bathroom? Freedom 90 indeed.



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Banned
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PostPosted: 06-26-2005 06:10 PM           Profile Send private message  E-mail  Edit post Reply with quote


Geebs wrote:
Ah, well, you see it's embarassing when you're with someone you barely know, say "I'm just nipping to the bathroom", and then get stuck there for a quarter of an hour trying to force out the first drop. Doesn't make you seem like a wierdo, nosiree


I tried not to fart around my gf the first time I stopped at hers (before we were officially going out or shaging or anything), out of courtesy I decided I'd go to the bathroom whenever I needed to let one out. Cue me getting excrutating pain when I led down then as soon as I reached the bathroom to let out massive farts the pain when away and I couldn't fart, I must have done that 15 times. Told her a month or two later about that night and she said she'd been wondering what I was doing :D

In short, I fart around her now.... maybe a bit too much. She'll probably take a shit in one of my trainers before too long to get revenge. Ahh young love :D



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Arrr?
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PostPosted: 06-26-2005 06:12 PM           Profile Send private message  E-mail  Edit post Reply with quote


mik0rs wrote:
In short, I fart around her now.... maybe a bit too much. She'll probably take a shit in one of my trainers before too long to get revenge. Ahh young love :D


:lol:




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oldskool
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PostPosted: 06-26-2005 10:43 PM           Profile Send private message  E-mail  Edit post Reply with quote


2 - Once my middlefinger just tore through the paper and I touched my poopy hole. It'll never happen to me again, EVER.

btw, poop nuggets are quite bad too, not that I had them.




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Privates Investigator
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PostPosted: 06-26-2005 10:48 PM           Profile Send private message  E-mail  Edit post Reply with quote


that's what soap is for




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oldskool
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PostPosted: 06-26-2005 11:51 PM           Profile Send private message  E-mail  Edit post Reply with quote


will it cleanse my innocence too?




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