Yes or No. Is there a God.
If I'm in a bar, taking a big dip of Copenhagen, with a glass of shitty Coors lite beer and a Jim Beam shooter beside me, I will always say, without a doubt, yes.
I beleive in God and that Jesus Christ is my personal savior.
Mainly because I consider myself redneck and my long hair can't cover it.
It is the American way, to profess a belief in God and baby Jesus while commiting a bevy of sins and threatening to pound the ass of liberal elites.
I just believe that professing to believe and not actually follow the teachings is better than openly saying, "FUCK NO I DON'T BELIEVE" just in case there is a God and Jesus is your personal savior!
At least I can say in the afterlife, "I TOLD THAT BIKER CHICK I WAS TRYING TO BANG, I BELIEVED IN YOU! REMEMBER?
I don't think that eternal hellfire is something I want to risk, so I will comply with my own set of American, apple pie, getting to heaven, to sit with God rules.
So as long as I say "Hell yeah! God, please let Mark Martin win a Nascar championship while I'm still alive!" as I belly up to the bar, I believe that makes me "saved" and that is just as good as going to confession!
applebee's needs to know when to cut people off on Friday afternoon!
I beleive in God and that Jesus Christ is my personal savior.
Mainly because I consider myself redneck and my long hair can't cover it.
It is the American way, to profess a belief in God and baby Jesus while commiting a bevy of sins and threatening to pound the ass of liberal elites.
I just believe that professing to believe and not actually follow the teachings is better than openly saying, "FUCK NO I DON'T BELIEVE" just in case there is a God and Jesus is your personal savior!
At least I can say in the afterlife, "I TOLD THAT BIKER CHICK I WAS TRYING TO BANG, I BELIEVED IN YOU! REMEMBER?
I don't think that eternal hellfire is something I want to risk, so I will comply with my own set of American, apple pie, getting to heaven, to sit with God rules.
So as long as I say "Hell yeah! God, please let Mark Martin win a Nascar championship while I'm still alive!" as I belly up to the bar, I believe that makes me "saved" and that is just as good as going to confession!
applebee's needs to know when to cut people off on Friday afternoon!
roflmao!Dukester wrote:If I'm in a bar, taking a big dip of Copenhagen, with a glass of shitty Coors lite beer and a Jim Beam shooter beside me, I will always say, without a doubt, yes.
I beleive in God and that Jesus Christ is my personal savior.
Mainly because I consider myself redneck and my long hair can't cover it.
It is the American way, to profess a belief in God and baby Jesus while commiting a bevy of sins and threatening to pound the ass of liberal elites.
I just believe that professing to believe and not actually follow the teachings is better than openly saying, "FUCK NO I DON'T BELIEVE" just in case there is a God and Jesus is your personal savior!
At least I can say in the afterlife, "I TOLD THAT BIKER CHICK I WAS TRYING TO BANG, I BELIEVED IN YOU! REMEMBER?
I don't think that eternal hellfire is something I want to risk, so I will comply with my own set of American, apple pie, getting to heaven, to sit with God rules.
So as long as I say "Hell yeah! God, please let Mark Martin win a Nascar championship while I'm still alive!" as I belly up to the bar, I believe that makes me "saved" and that is just as good as going to confession!
applebee's needs to know when to cut people off on Friday afternoon!
Possibly...but if so, it ain't the cranky, jealous mofo of the desert religions. 'It' may have kicked off the big bang, but otherwise has no other influence on the day to day workings of the universe.
As a scientific matter, this hypothesis is completely superfluous...but something deep in my loins won't let me completely abandon the possibility.
As a scientific matter, this hypothesis is completely superfluous...but something deep in my loins won't let me completely abandon the possibility.
that puts it into words for me :icon14:Hannibal wrote:Possibly...but if so, it ain't the cranky, jealous mofo of the desert religions. 'It' may have kicked off the big bang, but otherwise has no other influence on the day to day workings of the universe.
As a scientific matter, this hypothesis is completely superfluous...but something deep in my loins won't let me completely abandon the possibility.
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Underpants?
- Posts: 4755
- Joined: Mon Oct 22, 2001 7:00 am
I enjoy inter-conversing with you guys more than I would with some kind of fused superbeing incorporating the best traits of everyone I work with.
that said, I've fallen into a routine of answering the appallingly bluntstupidhypocritical with a time-saving "well said, fuckhead."
I expect to be fired any day now.
that said, I've fallen into a routine of answering the appallingly bluntstupidhypocritical with a time-saving "well said, fuckhead."
I expect to be fired any day now.
Last edited by Underpants? on Sat Apr 14, 2007 1:52 am, edited 2 times in total.
